Another Year has Passed and I'm Disappointed

Another year has come and gone. I'm now 27 years old and it causes me to pause and think. What have I done up until this point? What are my accomplishments? Sure, at my birthday dinner, I received a handful of cards from family with lovely notes of the same old sayings. I got a "I'm so proud of the woman you have become", a "We are so proud of the person you are", and a "You've always made us proud".
It makes me wonder. What have I done that is so great? There are so many people that by my age, have done so many amazing things that it makes me feel a bit inadequate. Shall we take a look and compare the lives of some people you surely have heard of to my pretty dull existence?

At age 27:
Kurt Vonnegut, Jr. dropped out from his job at General Electric to become a full-time writer.

Henry David Thoreau went off for two years to live alone in a cabin at Walden Pond.

Cosmonaut Yuri Gagarin became the first person in space.

Memphis millionaire Frederic W. Smith, whose father built the Greyhound bus system, founded Federal Express.

Scottish botanist David Douglas discovered the Douglas fir.

Ernest Hemingway published his first novel, The Sun Also Rises.

Boston dentist William Morton pioneered modern anesthesiology after learning that inhalation of ether will cause a loss of consciousness.

Jimi Hendrix choked to death on his own vomit after ingesting wine and sleeping pills.

Janis Joplin died of an overdose of whiskey and heroin.

With the obvious exception of the last two negative outcomes on the list, all of these people have done great things at the ripe age of 27. Don't even get me started on the people that have accomplished so much at a much younger age then I am currently at. It isn't that I'm feeling "old" or feeling like the best years are behind me. It's just that I'm feeling like I've let people down. I feel like I've wasted a large chunk of life being a dreamer. What have I done that is so praise worthy? Because of possible fear of failure, I haven't finished a single thing I've sworn to myself I would by this age. In high school, I knew by the time I was 27, I would have finished school, started my career, and moved far away from Arkansas to become a great success. With age has come some wisdom that says Arkansas is not as bad as I had once thought. It's my destiny to stay here and hopefully still have some moderate success.

Let's look at some of the things I have accomplished. I have had a few poems published in the local paper when I was going through the "dark misunderstood poet" phase of my life. I gave birth to a little boy who is the light of my life and have been the best mother I can possibly be. I have married my best friend and have never regretted it a day of our marriage. I bought my first house when I was 22 years old and I can say the alphabet backwards. Wow! What a list.

The only way that I'll be able to live with myself is to plan to spend the next 27 years doing what I've set out to do. In August I'll be back in school to finish up that chapter in life. I plan on finally getting my degree in writing. I know this doesn't mean that I will automatically get a book deal or even sell one story. This will symbolize to me that I finally finished something in my life. It will mean that I have the ability to start a career of some sort. It will mean that maybe I'll actually be worthy of the cards that I will surely receive that will have more praise filled odes about the life I have lived and woman I have become.